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Life of Addiction – Thoughts and Attitude

Many of our thought process and ‘day dreams’ are recurring in our life. We are habituated to have such ‘day dream’ and thought flow. It is a sort of ‘addiction’ to the psychological responses or behaviors. This type of psychological addiction is very subtle. It is not very easy to understand why we behave in such way.

We are slaves to our addiction. We have to attain freedom from our addictions.

Some people get tense always. Some people are always cool. Some people are always feeling inferior and some always feeling superior. All are addiction to respective mood. If you are addicted to get angry, then you get angry for anything and everything. A set of psychological addictions becomes our character and attitude. They are our immediate responses to evens in life.

People who are positive, always positive in all the situation. People who are negative are always negative in all the situation. Some people find problems in the workplace and change the office and keep changing the offices for the same reason again and again. They may be addicted to find problems in their work place.

Some people are always happy and some are always sad. Some people are always having depression without any reason. All because of addiction.

Normally, smoking and drinking are defined as addiction. But 99% of our character and attitude are addictions. We get addicted to behave in such way.

All types of addiction are genetic or we developed with or without our awareness.

Certain addictions can improve our life. Certain addictions can ruin our life. Human is empowered with get the control over all types of addiction. We can create new addiction and erase old addiction. Awareness or conscious about your consciousness can control your addiction. It is like watching yourself by you.

Phobia is also an addiction in some cases, it can be eliminated by conscious effort.

Please be aware that any activity which you keep doing or repeating without valid reason or sufficient emotional thrust; means you are addicted to that activity.

Psychologically induced high blood pressure is normally life long. Because the person gets addicted to the mood or mental state which increase blood pressure and pulse rate. Until removing the addiction to that ‘mood’ medicines are useless. If the person remove the addiction to that mood, within a fraction of second blood pressure will come to normal. This is not a medical miracle. Just having control over your addictions of mood.

Some people get addicted to be cool, calm, and relaxed. Whatever happen they can sleep well. Masturbation is mainly due to addiction, except at the early stage.

Addiction is not wrong. If you do not addicted to the sound of your name, then you will not identify you with your name. Depending upon the impact of addiction over you, your surrounding and your life, it can be termed as good or bad. If the addiction improves your life continue it, otherwise remove it. Removing is nothing but stop involving in that activity. Good or bad which you have to decide.

After starting my blog, slowly a new addiction developed in me. That is addiction to ‘blogging’. I try to blog when I am not moved by anything to write. Some impulse is pushing me to write about something. I come to aware that I am addicted to Blogging. I decided to remove it.

I started to blog for expressing about something which stirs me. Something which gives feast to my analytical skills. Of Course. I am proud being addicted to analyze. This addiction with limitation (not too much) improves my life and career too.

Blogging gives satisfaction to me. Initially, I blog when I can and what I like at my comfort. Later I come to know that, revenue can be generated from blogs through advertisement programs, which entice me to ‘keep blogging’. Now it is getting a stage of addiction.

I do not want my blog to be filled by ‘Vacum’ content. I want my blog to be having something stirs my feelings and analytical skill. So I stop looking my blog every day. Whenever I am about to blog something, I postpone it for two or three days. If I still have the trust after three days then I write. I gave low priority to blogging activity. Slowly the blogging conscious is removed. Often I give break to blogging activity. Now I am free from blogging addiction.

Our life is just a collection of our addictions.

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Blogging Becomes Stress

Bloggers are booming. Blogging open the way for everybody to write. You do not need to be high-educated scholar to blog. With average language skills able to describe that’s all. It is free hand writing.

But this Blogging becomes stress when you blog for money. You may hear about stories of Successful Bloggers. Blogs can be monetirised. All this can make you believe that blogging can be an easy way for earning money.

This is not true. If you blog for money, you will loose writer’s spirit. You skip from blogger’s attitude. Successful bloggers blog when they like to blog. But bloggers for money try to blog all the time; they like to fill their blog with anything and everything. It is not the quantity but quality makes the different.

You will keep searching for topic, and ideas to blog. Instead of writing about something, which moves and stirs you, you try to write a diary. Sometimes you start to steal. You use your office hours to blogging. You hate to do office works. You hate to spend time with your friends and family. You always want to keep writing or filling your blog. You have urgency or hurry to get your blog filled. Your mind will be obsessed with blogging.

You dream that soon you are going to earn huge money from your blog. So you rush to get your blog filled. Each and every second something come to your mind to fill your blog.

This is a sort of stress called Blogging Stress. When you blog casually when you can and what you like, it is a hobby. You can enjoy blogging hobby. True bloggers do not expect any monetary return from their hobby. They expect a sense of satisfaction and enjoyment. But when you see blogging is a business opportunity you loose the pleasure of blogging. Blogging becomes a work to you.

You schedule your timing to blog. You pressurize you to write blog without motivation. Even your creativity is empty; you do not wait for it to come up. You do not wait for something to blossom in you to write. All this because you see blogging is a source to make money through advertisement. Sooner or later you will get depression by becoming forceful blogging machine. Too much of anything is bad, including blogging.

True bloggers do not work for blogging. They write when something move their spirit. They blog when they like to share something. Like flower blossoming, blog blossoms to them. They do not fix time frame or join the race of filling their blog. In a spontaneous moment they start writing.

If you see blogging as a source of financial freedom, then sooner or later you will develop blogging stress. If you have blogging stress please stop blogging. Stop vomiting many things instead of writing few things with creativity.

Keep blogging, if you have the true blogging spirit. Otherwise you will be wasting your resources like time, money and energy.

There is no true financial freedom. Even if you start earning from your blog, you are not secure financially. Somebody may hack your site or your hosting server may go down or your advertiser (pay per click) company may change their policy. So blog if you have the spirit of blogging, please do not let the blogging be one more factor for stress.

Let the blogging be a hobby and pleasure, not a business until it really starts yielding business.

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Writing can control Mind, cure obsessive compulsive disorder

Mind is fast. It is difficult to control it. Especially when it is obsessed with some repeated thoughts. Ego stimulated feelings or negative feelings like jealous, angry will stir your thought like anything. No need to say about sexual feelings. Emotional hijack is the final stage.

People suggest yoga, medidation, pranayama and other highbrow breathing concepts to control the mind. But ordinary people cannot practice such things. Many people do not have time and ‘mind’ to learn and practice.

Silicon civilization is the busiest civilization on the earth. Even human breathing length is shortened here. Too busy to have a relaxed breath.

Instead of controlling the mind, we can divert the mind. Diversion is easier than controlling.

Writing is one of the easy ways to divert the mind. When you start writing, mind changes its focus to the topic you are writing. You can not write one issue and think about another issue. Mind is synchronized with writing. Without your effort mind will change.

You get angry with somebody in your workplace or neighborhood or while traveling or etc. But you are not able to express your feelings. You can not express your angry feeling to your boss. You can not express your angry feeling to your teacher. You can not express your angry feeling to your spouse.

You can express your all feelings freely if ‘Unconditional Love’ exists.

All your suppressed emotions come out as thoughts. You shout, beat the source of your angry. You design diligent plan to put ‘them’ down. All in day dreams or thoughts or imagination. While working, eating, speaking to somebody your mind is busy developing angry thoughts. Not only angry thoughts , suppressed sex feelings completely hijack your mind. Mind will be busy generating sexual thoughts.

In this situation you can not stop your mind. Why you have to stop your thoughts? that’s you have to decide. If you wish to stop proceed further.

All this ‘smoldering’ thoughts and stress increase the relevant stress.

If you are angry at a person, then start writing the good features of that person. Immediately mind will switch to produce good thoughts. If that person is inhuman and does not have a single good character from your point of view, then write about your good friends or good things or places you like or people you like.

Then your mind stops producing the obsessive thoughts. It becomes cool and happy by thinking about what you like.

What you stuff in the mind that will reflect in thoughts. Suppressed emotions can lead to obsessive thoughts. If you stuff anger, it will produce angry thoughts, if you stuff sex, it will produce sexual thoughts, if you stuff fear it will produce fearful thoughts. To counter fear you need to stuff courage into your mind.

Just start writing about what is opposite of echoed in the mind. That is all. Mind will divert easily.

If you have angry thought, just write about what you like. If you are sad, then write about what is happy to you. If you have too much of sex urge, then write about divinity.

Write about opposite of running in mind or something different or strange from what is running in mind. This will change your thought flow.

This type of writing habit can cure obsessive compulsive disorder. Writing for minimum on one or two pages is enough. If you practice this type of writing, you can feel the drastic change in your mental health.

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When to monetize your blog

Bloggers can earn money from their blog. By showing advertisement from (PPC) advertisement companies bloggers earn. But this is not true for all the bloggers. All the bloggers are not earning.

If you start a blog today and install a pay per click program’s JavaScript code and looking for dollar ($) tomorrow, soon you will get depressed out of keep checking your ppc account. You will see no click and single or two digit impressions, which is also by search engines robots.

If you keep seeing this poor reports everyday then checking your account will be stress to you. Facing something, which keeps you disappointed, will lead to frustration and depression.

Successful bloggers took months and years of blogging to reach the current stage. They have huge visitor base to their blogs.

Unless you are a popular person already, your blog will not get popular immediately. If Virat Kholi is starting a blog, it becomes instant popular. If a nonentity starts a blog it needs time and quality content to mature.

Visitor count is the key factors in monetizing your blog. If you have poor visitor count it is best to avoid approaching PPC programs. With poor visitor traffic you will die out of poor click through rate and impression report. Assess your traffic honestly before start monetizing your blog.

Moreover, your concentration will be diverted from blogging to tracking visitors. You start finding ways to increase your visitor traffic. Your blog will be empty but your head is full of ideas to bring visitors. What is the use of bringing visitors, if your blog do not have quantity and quality. Empty blogs with more visitors is not going to alter the CTR/impression report any way.

Stop trying to monetise your blog till you have sufficient visitor traffic, otherwise you will be shouting at ‘Deaf Ear’.

Set a goal for you as hundred visitors or thousand visitors per day. Do not rush to reach that level. Let it come naturally, and you keep blogging. Once visitor traffic reach certain level try for advertisement. Let the traffic be natural. Do not try for it. Let it be natural. If you concentrate on visitor traffic you will loose blogging. If you concentrate on blogging your visitor traffic will grow slowly and steadily. Without 250 visitors or 500 page views minimum per day do not try to monetize you blog.

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Say No to Manage Job Stress

Today, I spoke with my friend, who is working in a BPO as call center executive. I was afraid to speak to him, since he will start complaining his tough life style and fearful job culture. Because I was too in such situation few years back. Many times he says of giving up the job.

Tension stimulates tension. Fear stimulates fear. Stress stimulates stress. Confidence stimulates confidence. Comfort stimulates comfort. Mood stimulates mood.

So I tried to avoid him. But anyway he is my friend. I spoke to him over phone. He meets his physician (doctor) regarding his health. His doctor advised him a complete medical checkup. Strictly advised to change to a peaceful job. So he will be presenting his resignation paper soon.

It is not all the BPO people who are getting stress. If job is the reason for stress, then everybody who is working in the field must suffer. Not all the people who work in call centers or software companies get stress related problems. Some people get stress, some people enjoy the job. If it is a poison, it should kill everybody, but whether it is a poison or honey varies from individual to individual.

Even in some cases those who are stressed out now in their job, have achieved great challenges in the past.

From my personal experience and observation, I notice two types of stress. Physical stress and mental stress. When you are driven to work more than what your body can deliver then physical/body stress begins. Rest is the only medicine for this type of stress. When you do something but you do not like to do it. You are not able to say no. You do something with fear and tension. In these situation mental stress begins. If you are alone and having angry/hate feelings with your immediate boss or with somebody else then you will have severe stress. Develop an ability to say No when you like to say no and eradicating fear and tension are the only medicine to get rid off mental stress. Once stress removed its problems will be automatically disappear.

When I develop an attitude of Surrendering to God, I find my fear and tension get reduced, so that my stress too reduced. Once I stop fearing and getting tense, I am able to say No, when I like to say No. I feel I am getting back to my teen age. I never worried even loosing the job to say No.

Fear and tension sucks your energy like anything. If hate, angry, and physical excessive work joined together fear and tension, then they all make you empty.

If you give up your job, then again you will fear about your future. If you feel JOB is your self-identity then you cannot give up the job. You catch the tail of tiger.

It is not all the people who get stressed out. It is who have fear and tension in the current job and not able to say No are victim of stress.

Those who are able to say No and do not have fear and tension enjoy both job and personal life.

Surrender to God or having tremendous self-confidence is best way to eradicate fear and tension in life.

Kill your fears. Say No when you like to say No. I assure you will not have stress in doing any kind of job.

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Opportunities Missed by Fear of unknown and Hesitation

Fear of unknown and hesitation miss many opportunities in life. From love to comfort many un-availed things are missed out in life.

If we express our love, the girl would have accepted. She may be waiting for your courting. But we may hide our emotions and feelings because of many imaginative fears. But, at the same time we keep boiling our desire. We act like we are brother to the girl, but we romance in dreams. It is like, we have a chocolate in our mouth, but we do not swallow it or we do not spite it out.

If we apply for the job, we could have got it, but we do not apply for big jobs/post with big salary. But we hesitate with lot of complex. We satisfy with our self with how we are now, due to many sentiments, our convenient logic. If we ask for the promotion or hike, we will be given, but we do not ask, instead of asking, we wait for our boss to do it. The boss may be busy with some other issues. Your due may not be his first priority, but he aware that you deserve the hike/promotion. We may like to do something, but we do not do immediately. We wait for some good time to do. Like that you Boss may be. If we ask we could have it.

At the same time, we should not expect our expressed desire/demand should be done immediately. It may be executed immediately or later on or denied. Our duty is express. Whether we make request or not that is in our control, but the response is not in our control. We should be ready to accept the response, whatever may be. But we should express.

If you keep bottle necking your desire to get hike/promotion, the end will be beginning at another office. If you have ventilated your pressures, you could be comfortable in the current office.

The opportunity we miss, which will haunt our mind for long time, than opportunity we availed. If I asked, If I asked – this murmur will continue till you sleep in coffin. Even if you ask and your request is rejected, that will affect you for the moment. But missing due to non-expression will torture you for long time. If you try, you may succeed or fail, but you will be in peace. If you do not try, you will loose your peace.

A man, who had love with woman, will not be obsessed by her; woman to whom he had requested but denied will not obsess him. But, he will be obsessed by woman to whom he had not expressed his love.

Kill the fear of unknown, inferiority complex, and hesitation. Dare to realize your dream and desire the best. You deserve to be best. Ask your best.

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Obsessed with Ideas

I meet two people with many Ideas, They have quest to achieve something in the Internet. They keep thinking about many innovative concepts. One guy explained his idea to me. I asked my doubts, while clarifying my doubts he get another idea. They he tried to jump to his new idea. But I forced him to stay with the idea he was explaining. His head seems to be business model factory.

I am not sure whether this is creativity or any problem/stress in the mind. Because, for many years they are living with their ideas. Idea produces more ideas. The problem is none of the idea in their head gets executed practically. They keep stuffing their head by ideas. But nothing gets de-stuffed. Idea in its own abstract form can not succeed. It needs to be practically implemented.

Which stop them from executing their ideas? If they have executed any one idea and stick to it, then things will be different from now. Two things stop implementing the ideas. Lack of confidence and lack of belief on the Idea. Feverishness or mental obsess about the idea also prevent the action at the same time urging for action. It reaches a stage of Action constipation. Third reason is the idea is beyond their capacity to execute.

If they are in any one stage or more, they dont act practically, but keep thinking about the idea, keep speaking about the idea, and keep producing ideas. They like all their ideas and want to implement all. They will have bottle neck of time and resource and confidence. Nothing will be implemented

They did not earn single bit of currency from their ideas. But they keep boasting their ideas to others and enjoy the oral appreciation from the innocent listeners. They like the listeners but not the executioners. Because they do not like their ideas to be executed by others.

Many people are wasting their time and mental energy to be obsessed with ideas. Real idea will blossom like flower and you will not be obsessed with other ideas. Focus on only one thing, which will definitely give result either positive or negative or at least your mind will be free from more ideas.

Implement what comes to your mind. Definitely you will earn either money or knowledge or both. At least, you stop suffering from new ideas. Choose what is best and what you can do and stick to it. Implement it; certainly there will be a positive result: money, knowledge, or no more ideas and you will wake up from your world of ideas. Once you realize the pain of implementation, you will dare to come out with another idea.

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Be Confident when your colleague is Fired or Terminated

Relax, Be cool and calm, and be positive, if the company you are working is firing your next sitting colleague. Just be cool and relaxed. Be detached. Do not get angry with company or do not have pity at your colleague. No need for having emotions in this issue. Use your brain than emotions.

Do not get fear as you may be fired. Just be cool. Birth and death are not your control. Many things are in divine control. So just relax. You do not know, you will join this company few years back. You are not going to work permanently here. Some day you also have to leave, the reason may be anything. But you must exit. As long as you are working here, have courage to say not, when you have to say. Do not work too hard or strain yourself. Work what you can. Keep your temper always cool. Never get tension and never get fear.

Your company is not the end of the world. World is a big market with lot of varieties. The colleague who is fired will be in a better position than the current. It is foolish to have the illusion that your colleague’s life is over. This is mind’s negative imagination. As long s/he confident, enthusiastic, and positive, s/he can find a niche in the job market. Just relax. Termination or retirement is just another event in life. See it simply. There is life after layoff.

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Job change due to Consultancy

Job changing is also happening due to consultancy screwing. Highly profiting business is head hunting.

When you do not have an intention to change or you like to continue in the current company, you will receive consultancy calls like anything. If you are skilled and potential candidate and you are in booming and growing industry, then you may receive 3 to 5 consultancy calls per day. If your resume is short listed by the client of the consultancy then you are hot.

A female with a charming voice or a male with a highly professional and cordial voice will contact over your mobile phone. They will tell that their Prestigious client has a vacancy which best suit your profile. Prestigious client will pay more than what is your CTC (Cost to Company) and etc. If you listen their pitching and get oscillated slightly, you will be tossed like anything.

When you attend the interview with their prestigious client, you will find which may be smaller than your current company.

If you are in India and in software industry, you will be told that an American or Canadian or Australian or any foreign client is waiting for you to conduct the interview. H/She liked your resume very much. Moreover H/She will be catching the flight by today or tomorrow evening. So you suppose to attend the interview as early as possible, otherwise you will miss a Golden Opportunity.

If you attend the interview in hurry burry (get permission from current office by telling a lie), you will be received by a typical Indian, who is with full of ego and high handed behavior as Interviewer. He will have fleeting glance over your resume. Then he will ask the traditional question, Tell about yourself. Though your resume has important things about you, you have to answer this question.

I do not join the company, who asked the traditional question, which is not any way helpful if you are a technical person. Within a week, the prestigious client of your consultancy will contact you directly. The consultancy will be skipped.

One time, a consultancy call was pitching about a CMM level company. I asked is it possible to get 100% hike from my current CTC. Consultancy said it will discuss with the company. Then they contacted me again and said that salary was not an issue. When I attend the interview that CMM level company, said my current CTC is beyond their budget.

CMM Level and big MNCs are numerous like petty shop or tea shops nowadays.

If you are in dilemma when replying to consultancy in the first call, there are chances you may change the job without your interest.

Changing the company for 10 to 30 percent hike is not good in case you are already settle down in your current company.

Their next strategy is making you attend the interview is, make yourself committed. They snatch the word from your mouth and convey that they have informed and confirmed to their client. So if you fail to attend interview you may have guilty feeling. So you will attend the interview to keep your word.

Consultancy is also one of the reasons for salary hike. They always tell you that you will get more than current CTC. It is very rare you move to another company without change in pay.

Quick job hopping is not good for both you and your employers. If you everything going well, stay in a company for minimum one year and maximum 2 to 3 years. But do not continue for more than 3 years in the same company. This is not good for both you and your employer.

Do not be scapegoat for consultancy enticement. Unless you personally decide to move to another company never listen consultancy pitching. Ignore at the first call.

Consultancy is charging you it is not because you are skilled and qualified. It is because your industry is good. There may be a booming or great demand. It is seller’s market – Employee’s market.

If you industry is not good then you have to chase consultancy. I remember that few years back, I charged consultancies; even I paid to register with them. They will conduct a mock interview too. That time was buyer’s market – employer’s market. Now things changed, main reason is industry is good and growing. Soon you may be paid to attend interviews.

You dodge consultancy or consultancy dodge you, nothing depends on you or consultancy. It is the market decides everything. Your experience, skill, and everything will be counted if your industry is good.

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Good and Bad of Career

Every man in this world must earn for their bread and butter. We should work or do something to meet out our needs. Depending upon the educational or skill set we earn. The modern world called it as ‘Career’. Every one should have a career, whether your pay cheque is for $1 or $100000 or more. You may be a manager at MNC or house keeping staff in a MNC, everything is career.

Our life style has two boundaries. Before starting a career and after starting a career.

Before starting a career we are free birds. Read the books we like, roamed anywhere at anytime. Chatting, laughing with our friends. Day or night has no restriction for our enjoyment. We have lot of games. We play many indoor and outdoor games. No hesitation, no fear. Mind is not obsessed with anything. No need to think about what is next. See all the movies. Watch or enjoy the beauties of girls in our sphere. Lots of bear parties. Those who are interested in particular game or activity, dedicate their whole time for it.

It is a state of consciousness, where your mind is free from time restriction, no fear about failure. Mind is highly energetic. No tension. It is a life with out commitment. You can move, turn, and change any way you like. You have full freedom and power in driving your life.

When the evil hands of career trapped you, first thing you lost is your freedom. You are forced to read book related to improve your career. Second thing you loose your friends. Career throws the friends to different corner of the world. I remember my father searched and meet his village, school, college friends after his retirement. Once you are caught by career you will loose your contacts with your friends slowly.

Then you loose your ownership to your time. Something or somebody will be the owner of your time. Whatever may be your pay cheque, what level of (high profile or low profile) designation you have, the core activity of your career is selling the time. Without selling your time you can not enroll into a career.

Your interest is coffined. Whether you like or do not like you have to do the responsibilities piled on your head. You loose the freedom to say No when you like to say no.

You can choose your friend but you can not choose your colleague, you have to adjust with your colleagues.

Fun and play or games are completely removed from your life. It is very rare to find people who are playing the games which they played in their teen ages or before trapped by career. You do not have time and you do not have teammates to join with you. Everybody is in shortage of time and running on heels for the sake of career. All the pleasures of youth are gone.

Career does not like the free mind. It keeps filling the mind with targets. It will obsess you with the ‘next thing’ to be done. What is next is always hooking your head. The job consciousness is forcibly stuffed in you head. You can not de-stuff it even after your retirement, since you will not have anything to fill other than your career.

Career sees you as a resource. You are a resource to execute some task or to be utilized. You are committed to career.

The tyrant career keeps you as its slave. But look at your children or any dependents you have, especially who are in their pre-career stage. They enjoy their life because of you. You have mortgaged yourself for them. They live to the full spirit like how you lived when your father or guardian surrender to career. You enjoyed your youth because your parent surrendered to career. Now, its your turn for the sake of your children or dependents.