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Youtube Addiction

Like alchoholic addiction, I am addicted to watching youtube videos.  Everyday 2 to 3 hours before sleep, I watch youtube – 10 PM to 1 AM – three hours I watch youtube.

I would not get sleep, If I do not watch  youtube. It has become an habit before sleep.

I take Outh as not to watch youtube.  I consciously do not watch youtube for a week.  Then I break my outh and watch youtube videos as usual.

Because of youtube watching my sleeping duration has reduced.  It is hard to resist youtube, it continuesly shows likelyhood videos automatically as per our interest.

I am trying to stop watching youtube, but failed in my determination many times.

Late night youtube watching has reduced sleeping duration, diluted sleeping quality. No time and energy for other activities.   No talking with family members.  Every bit of freetime, will be used for watching youtube.

I realised that I am addicted to youtube now.  I do not know how to get rid of this addiction.  I am not getting sleep even I goto bed by 10 PM.

As usual, I have token Outh yesterday as not to watch youtube.  I did not watch youtube yesterday.  But today I am sleepless.  Post midnight, I will start sleeping as usual.

Hope, this time, I will succeed in my Outh.

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Self Pressure – Self Image

We have self image about ourself.  We expect what is happening to us should be within acceptable range of our self image.  We can not accept if something happening breaching our self image.

A person studying good at school and college, started to believe about  himeself as a good performing guy.  He can not accept, if he is given low rating in his job.  Poor feedback in job is breaching his self image as good performing guy.

We develop a belief system about ourself by seeing our face.  If anything  happening to me beyond my belief system, I can not tolerate.

I have a belief or opinion that I am a good programmer.  I understand business models and implement them as softwares. Sometimes if I can not understand a business model and not able to implement as softwares, I can not tolerate, I will start to doubt my skills.  My confidence dilutes.

The fact is nobody knows everything.  There are things which we can not do.  Not everything we can accompolish.  When the task is within our command, we get it done, and develop confidence.  When the task is beyond our comand, we are not able to do it, and loose confidence.  We afraid what will happen bad because of the failure.

Failures, not able to uderstand, not able to complete a task all are part of life.  If our self-image allows failures too, then we will be comfortable in embarassing moments too.  We are not special, not to be scolded, criticized, embarassed.  As long as our self image is flexible, we will be in a bliss.

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Decision Paralysis

When you want to take corrrect decision, but do not know what is correct, then you can not take decision.  You keep postponding making decision.  Ths is Decision Paralysis.

Decision paralysis will not solve any problem.  It extends the current situation.  Until you take decision, your problem will not solve. Decision Paralysis continue your sufferings.

Decision Paralysis will not allow you to take a decision, because you afraid that your decision may go wrong.

How do overcome decision paralysis? When you do not have experience and information to take correct decision, take decision at your will.  Move on.  Dont get stagnated without taking a decision.  Either correct or wrong decision, both will bring change.  A change from your current state.

Take decision to know what is right and wrong.  Once you know what is right and wrong, you will be able to take right decision.  You will have a flow, where you do not need to take decision.  You will follow the flow.

When you are in decision paralysis, don’t know what is correct decision then don’t prolongate the situation.  Take a decision as per your liking or follow your fear.

Decision always brings change – good or bad – there will be a change.  Hesitation prevents change happening.

It is best to follow the flow, where you don’t need to take decision.  Use your experience and information when you have to take decision.  If you don’t have experenece and information, then follow your will or fear.  Will is best.

Take decision to take better decision in the future.